One Mile At A Time...

I knew Saturday was going to be more grueling than usual. Why? First, I am not really a runner and have yet to discover that zone that the real runners all talk about. You have heard of it – “all you can hear is your feet hitting the pavement and you are one with the road.” Not so much that way for me. I run because I have been given this incredible second chance at a lifestyle infused with fitness and I don’t want to waste anymore of my days not appreciating that precious gift. I love the feel of pushing this God-given machine to new heights, knowing that doing so will give me even more chances as challenges along the way. Running is not about a “time” or how perfect my run was. Running for me? It reminds me that for most of my life I would never have even dared to sign up, let alone lace up actual running shoes and do it. It assures me that I can do most anything that I put my mind to – even those things I once thought were impossible. And, it is also a time for me to reflect because I have absolutely nowhere to go or anything else to think about. On Saturday, I thought really hard while running, and decided to dedicate every mile to someone who had helped me get to this point in my life. Do you think perhaps that is why I can’t get into the zone? Maybe…but it sure made the mile markers more enjoyable. Here is my list. If you didn’t get on the list – don’t fret. I still have many more runs to enter and many more miles to ponder.

Mile 1 – dedicated to Alissa. You were the first one to dare me to run. You were the one who suggested we sign up for a 10K without ever having run in anything before. We accomplish big by dreaming big! Thank you for your friendship, your faith in me and in what we were doing (in more than just running). Thank you for waiting for me at that first finish line and challenging me to a second race. I got hooked to try it again….and again...and again!

Mile 2 – dedicated to Adam. Yes, friend…running at your side was an honor, but this is where I could no longer keep up with your speedy pace without pushing too hard (you are the one who has taught me the fine balance of challenging myself without overdoing it). Where do I begin? Thank you seems so insufficient. How do I thank someone for seeing that champion inside of me - even then - and patiently revealing her to me over such a long period of time? I hope she makes you proud and can give to others that same precious gift! Also - thank you for never letting me settle for less than what I could really do.

Mile 3 – dedicated to Laurie. This is when you stopped at the porta-potty and told me to keep running, and you would catch up! Did your heart rate ever get over 120? Please promise me you will run one at your best and reveal to yourself what you are really made of. Get that heart rate up there…your body was made to do this right? All I can say is thank goodness for T-ball on Saturday mornings. God sent you into the picture when I was about to give up and needed a boost forward. Yep! I hear your laughter and voice coming up behind me –talking to other runners….you social butterfly. You did catch up…..

Mile 4 – dedicated to my Eastern Canada Family. Wish I could name you all one by one, but I am tired and just like clockwork my right foot has gone numb. Why always around mile 4? Anyway.… True friends love you even when you aren’t that loveable. You guys loved me like that. My days with you were among the most difficult in my entire life, yet you loved me. And STILL do. How do you do it? How does your heart love so big that it can span miles and years without ever losing its power? Thank goodness for Facebook and cheap long distance. I still need you in my life!

Mile 5 – dedicated to my Grants Pass Family. . I hurt! That last hill was a doozy and my silly shoe keeps coming untied. Did I mention I still can’t feel my foot? I won’t quit! This is the turnaround point in this run, and that is what GP was for me – a chance to stop the downward spiral of my life and make a new turn. It has truly been a place of healing for me and each one of you has been a gift…a very integral part of that healing! This is home to me…a piece of my heart will always be in this wonderful community that so readily embraced and supported me. How do you ever really leave a place when it becomes part of who you are?

Mile 6 – dedicated to my Utah/Idaho Family. I am tired...thank goodness for the radio station blaring music and magical energy beans from the running store! I can’t tell you how good it feels to say that I am coming home! It will be an adjustment and a new adventure for me. I have been on my own for awhile, so be patient. But I am ready to be encircled in all the love, the chaos, and the built-in support system that a family is – especially the wonderful one I have been blessed with. I need you….and little man needs you.

Mile 7 – dedicated to Andrea. I am on the homestretch girl. Muscles are burning, heart is pumping. I can do this right? You always know how to look past the obstacles. What a blessing to have been here with you these last four years – a second chance to make up for 2 decades of not having you as a part of my life. Cousins by blood and sisters by heart. We have made some awesome memories here along with our little men! We have laughed and cried together on this journey, and I feel blessed to witness your strength and courage. All I can say is…you are not getting away from me again okay? Mexico this summer? I will settle for Vegas…anything and anywhere with you would be a blast! GAME ON!

Mile 8 – dedicated to Isaac. I am coming buddy! A small miracle has you waiting at the finish line for me today, and that makes this mile a little easier. I have to slow down just a bit, but I won’t stop! I wasn’t planning on seeing you today, and feel very blessed that you are there watching me run. I am glad you see me LIVING my life – because YOU are the main reason I decided to change it! You are so precious to me and gave me a reason to hold on when I wanted to quit. I knew you deserved your momma to be at her best....and I wanted to be able to play with you and keep up with you – my greatest gift in life! I love you infinity!

Mile 9 – dedicated to Amanda J. from CNW. I think I can, I think I can. Girl, I am about ready to die…can’t I just stop for a bit? Catch my breath? No. Thinking about you right now – and how you are embarking on this same journey. Can I just say – YOU SO GOT THIS! Don’t give up okay? Let’s keep in touch – I want to witness your journey - even if it is from afar. The incredible members at the Club are going to need another poster girl for taking back her life and living out loud…people like to know it is possible and will be silently watching - and Adam needs a new project to keep him on his toes.

Mile 10 – dedicated to me. It may sound selfish, but this one is for me. I can’t tell you how badly I am hurting right now. Every muscle in my body is screaming, and my digestive system is having spasms! An energy bean causes burping, and the water won’t go down. It must know we have just a little bit to go and all systems are off until we get there! I can feel the effects of surgery and a month without training. I have to dig deep right now….within myself and find just a little more gumption to move forward – one painful step at a time. Everything I have really needed to get to this point in my life – lies within me. While I may need outside resources to help – the Lord has given me all the power that I need – right inside – to propel my life forward. There the finish line...giving it all I have!